Job Offer:

Mysterious Marketing Manager

Starting Date:

Immediately
[or at some earlier date depending on chronal transport technology]

Starting Salary:

Negotiable based on experience
[and willingness to have obscure, questionable cryptocurrencies wired to your offshore account on the Isle of Man]

Location:

Survival bunker in ruins of Old Toronto (post 2025)
[Totally normal Toronto office (pre 2025)]

About The Mysterious Package Company

https://mysteriouspackage.com

"You may be wondering if the Mysterious Package Company is a scam, a joke, a trick, a front for some weird cult, or just the coolest thing you can get in your mailbox. The answer is no, sometimes, sort of, maybe, and absolutely."
- Neil Patrick Harris, actor, author, package afficionado

We deliver adventure by mail in the form of puzzles, stories and collectibles. Since 2013 we've delivered tens of thousands of suspicious packages worldwide! Our experiences are a mix of hand-crafted letters, aged newspaper clippings, forged documents, maps, codes, trinkets, statues and artifacts that tell an intriguing story, frequently delivered in an uncooperative wooden crate. The apparent authenticity of the physical components is unsurpassed (and has resulted in the occasional uncomfortable encounter with customs agents, police, and/or intelligence agencies).

We have the lofty goal of making the world a more interesting place. We need your help.

Position Summary:

You are a digital marketing expert with an interest in marketing creative products.

You have either purchased one of our products in the past, or you feel compelled to now that you know about us. Either way, you feel a strong alignment with our brand and a general excitement about marketing the company and our products.

You can manage digital marketing channels (email, paid social, search, display) and the analytics tools needed to measure and optimize your efforts. You are also comfortable building relationships and the guerrilla-tactics needed to get earned media via PR and influencers.

You aren't scared of ghosts. Except for knife ghosts.

Areas of Expertise:

The ideal candidate will have 5+ years of digital marketing experience. Success in the position will require expertise in the following areas:

How to Apply:

Send email with a resume to m33@mysteriouspackage.com.

In addition, we request your participation in an exercise simulating a typical day at the Mysterious Package Company, where you will on a daily basis be asked to find ways to sell ridiculous objects to an unusual clientele.

Imagine, if you will, that you are sitting at your desk, coffee steaming steamily beside you, head in your hands as you consider your life choices, when the following missive thuds moistly onto your desktop:

missive

Please attach your proposal to your email in addition to your CV, in whatever format or file system you find most amenable and plausibly impressive.

<end transmission>